Why am I defensive around my friends?

I find myself to be very defensive with my friends at times. I would take their advice as an insult, especially if it's unsolicited because I guess I feel like they shouldn't be telling me what to do. I have a problem with being afraid of being pushed around and being told what to do. I guess it stems from insecurity or something, I don't know. But I'm always on guard against being used by my friends. If one of my friends say something I consider to be insulting or condescending, I would find myself retaliating subtly through supposed "jokes" or sarcastically. I don't like this kind of behavior at all and I want to stop and just relax around my friends. I don't want to be on edge all the time and I definitely don't want to drive them away. Any suggestions on how to stop being this way? Thanks.